Die, Dies, Died, Dead
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Friday, June 20, 2008
11:01 PM
I don't know what's been eating me up lately - it seems more and more challenging for me to stay in context with this world, to identify with it and to live peacefully in it. Yet again, old problems come back and i am only left with 2 choices. Either i die or the world dies - in which i think the former will be of a more probable choice.
I hate the word "emo", for all things in this world, i HATE the word and i wish it never exist. Life's a bitch, but this word makes life seems like SHIT. Making fun of real emotions but using such a cheesy term - EMO. Well, currently i am facing some really difficult problems and am certainly not emoing so will you plz....Thank you.
It is as if i am stuck on a piece of chewing gum and i am trying to stay alive by swimming in it, while knowing and understanding the fact that i will never be able to get out of the SHIT taht is create by nobody else but me. I am all over the blame-it-on-others stage and am totally embracing the self-pity-is-cool phrase.
Well, there are so many things that happened (some are still on going, unfortunately) and I am, under most unfortunate circumtances, find myself thinking the most fundamental question of all time: Why people live while in actual fact, life's a bitch? DO YOU KNOW that from the start, from the very beginning, when we come popping out of our mom's vag or stomach (for mom who uses C-section), life is nothing but a sad phrase in what we call the life-cycle. DO YOU KNOW how i know what i understand from this??? Cause we all cry when we are born, we cried from the very beginning of our life and so life's just about sadness, misery and pain. The ending's sad too - we PERISH, we DIE, we DISAPPEAR and our corpses lay there waiting to be eaten by some god-forsaken living creatures. Yeah..it's sad. Thats precisely the reason why i HATE self-help books...you know, those TOMORROW-IS-ANOTHER-SUNNY-DAY book. Please...STOP LYING TO YOURSELF AND LOOK AT THE REALITY, what side of it is sunny.
Global Warming, Earthquakes, Tsunami - we brought this to ourselves and we have no one else to blame but ourselves. It really really depressing...as i speak of the Si Chuan Earthquake. You see those young lives crumble beneath the rumble and all one might be thinking was - What's for dinner tonight? And i was like OH SHITTY SHITTY GOD NO NO NO....
Fucked up - my life's fucked up right now and i feel as though no one's here to save me from the rumble that is beginning to bury me in it. Not trying to ask anybody here to save me but blog is really a good revenue to take the shit off my chest.
Ciao and thank you for NOT reading this post.
