Freakingly True Post
♥
Friday, November 7, 2008
9:12 PM
Oh well...So one day i suddenly became this person whom i am just not. All i wanted honestly is to stay grounded and to just lead a safe and happy carefree life with my friends. But this seriously...My dad told me that this would be a good opportunities to correct the wrongs that i have done in the very same post that i am in this time round and my mom told me that as long as you stay trueful to yourself nd do your job well, everything will just go smoothly and i will be a happier person, though still in the exact same place. I guess i will just have to try then.
Before i take up whatever challenges and whatever assignments and projects in the future, i would just like to tell you guys teh amazing journey that i took in CHS the moment i stepped inside and the people whom i eternally grateful to who took me upon this overwhelming road filled with challenges and obstacles.
I don't think i expected anything right from the start. What i expected is t have no friends, bad results and a lifestyle that is so fixed and simple that it would bore anyone to death. But in fact, i am utterly amazed and surprised when i clicked particularly with this group of people who I believe are still cheering on this journey as i type: Doreen, Melody, Yiyuan. They are three individuals with different personalities and backgrounds, however, i just felt that something in me "clicked" instantly when i met them the very first time. Indeed, they took down the mask that i have been having on for a very very long time. Somehow they just seen through me and seen me in my naked and true form. I became whom i want to be and enjoyed greatly when they understood every single thing that came out of my brain - things that i am trying to communicate and having people to come to terms with it for a very long time. I thank them for this wonderous journey that they have put me through and i hope that this will last as long as we shall be.
People whom i have been constantly impressed for a long time - Jun Kang, Eugene, Fangjie, Pearlyn, Zoe. They are some of the inspiration-givers to me. Jun Kang and Eugene are just amazingly fun to talk to and work with and Fangjie gives me and my fellow groupmates the right direction to carry on with a seemingly lifelong string of projects. Although i havent been talking to Pearlyn much, her attitudes towards life and others inspires me greatly. I remember once when Yuan Shan told Pearlyn something about not being confident about the image that she presents to others and how people look at her, Pearlyn said with full force that no one is ever meant to judge anyone - if i didnt rmb wrongly. That sentence gave me a certain direction towards something i never knew could be possible for me. Zoe is just amazing, I mean, even without me exactly talking to her a lot. She just have an aura of charismatic presence - even with her loud personality. That just shows me a completely different order of youth, in a way that i could hardly put in words. These people are just incredible and i honestly and sincerely thank you for having inspired me, even if you guys dunno abt it.
I was and still am an outcast. However, what's different from then and now is i met some of the most generous and open people of my generation. I am eternally grateful. And of course, not forgetting the most precious clique who have made me who i am now - Cheanfei, Yining and etc. They brought me from the depths of psychological hell to where i am now. To them i feel things that i cannot put them into words, as words are just too small to convey how much i am in debt to you guys.
I just want to say that no matter where i am, you guys will always be somewhere in my mind and i will always be appreciative whenever i think of the times when we are working on a project and things and ideas just clicked and found themselves suitable for our situation as we move on. I am deeply grateful to have been able to work with different people and enjoy the experience - something that i am unable to for a very long time, which i consider a form of disability.
As a human being - as me, i dun want to ever be in a place, in a position where i feel satisfied, so this also marks to time to improve myself and to spur myself on. My traits of irresponsibility and laziness i believe, must be improved upon and transform into something positive. My utter disdain for very troublesome things - haiz...i think i needa learn how to take care of them nw.
The directions towards the challenges ahead are still unknown. But no matter what occurs, i ask for your belief in me. When bizarre things arise - things about me, i only ask for your trust. And i shall end this post by saying how eternally grateful i will be towards you guys. I shall stay grounded and be myself no matter what i am and only abide to my rules and principles. For those whom i mentioned in this post, i thank you guys greatly and for those who i have forgot to add in here, i am in debt to you and i tell you that you are somewhere in my mind, surely.
XOXO
